Chapter thirty

Becca

Freezing Tuesday morning and I was shivering like a schizophrenic patient in the arctic. You know when you're wearing numerous layers of clothing and like 15 pairs of socks, yet you still can't feel your toes? Yeah that.

I hated this weather, it was depressing, but the thought of Kayden over-clouded the hate I felt right now. I smiled as me and Brooklyn crossed the road. We've been out since 10AM; she insisted we went early Christmas shopping. Dunno what kinda black person she thought she was, I would've still been in bed dreaming, but whatever. As long as I was getting the longest part out the way then cool!

"Happy for a change," she noticed.

I laughed. "Course I'm happy, it's a joyous occasion," I grinned.

She gave me an odd look. "You don't even like Christmas."

"I know." I grinned and she chuckled.

"You're mad. What we gonna wear for this Drake concert?"

I shrugged. "Wouldn't mind wearing a bin bag and flip flops. As long as I'm there I don't give a shit."

She laughed hysterically. "Knowing you, you'd do that."

I gave her a thumbs up and led her into Footlocker. Oh lawdy, nothing's better than witnessing other people do your own job at a time like this. Fucking brilliant. Brooks went straight to the hoody section as I browsed the store. My eyes stopped when I witnessed Mohammed behind the till. I smiled and went towards him.

"Wagwaan my Somalian friend?"

He chuckled. "You cool, Becc's?"

"Yeah, just came to watch you suffer. How long is your shift?"

"Got another three hours."

I snorted. "Hah! Good luck, may Allah be with you." I grinned and walked off to join Brooks as she scanned the hats. She picked up a NY one and looked as if she was in deep thought.

"Should I get this?" she asked.

"You don't even wear hats." I gave her a blank stare. Seriously, what's she on?

"I know, but it's just for show init! Or maybe I can get it for Charles, what d'you think?"

I analysed the hat carefully. "I think you're gonna need a bigger size. That dude has a head like Alien."

She laughed and nudged my arm. "Leave him! He's very sweet!"

"With a massive head. Get size 18 or something." I smiled and walked off behind the back doors. That's right, I'm the boss, I go wherever I please. These times I work here!

I walked into the staff room. Natasha and Nathan were sat at the table going through a newspaper; guess it was their break. They both looked at me simultaneously and Nathan smiled.

"Becc's, what you doing here?"

I shrugged. "I'm bored."

"So you come work?" I brought my index finger to my lips, indicating for him to be quiet.

"Is Kayden with you?" Natasha asked eagerly.

"Nope, probably roaming the streets."

"But it's his shift."

I shrugged a second time. "That's his business."

"When you see him tell him to holla," Nathan said.

I nodded and soon left them to it. Didn't know that Nathe and Natasha were cousins until Kayden pointed it out to me. They got on well. I entered through the doors again to see Brooklyn stood impatiently tapping her foot.

"Ready now?" she questioned in a huff.

"Mmhm."

We left Footlocker, with me giving Mohammed a Ha-Ha-Look-At-You-Still-Working-Like-A-Prick grin. We soon got back to hers with all the shopping and other useless shit. There were so many bags it made me wonder if I actually had a huge amount of money.

"Come, let's go wrap these up," she suggested. I nodded and we went to her room to get everything sorted. Half an hour later we were done wrapping and was relaxing...well I was. Brooks was too busy on the phone to that big-headed fool. Talk about whipped.

"I can't, Rebecca's here," she said quietly.

I looked up from my phone with a raised eyebrow, suddenly curious as to why the hell my name was mentioned. Not even being discrete about it. For real, I'm sat right here.

"..."

"I know, maybe tomorrow yeah?"

"..."

"The day after then... and I'll bring everything round, just for you." She flashed a cheeky smile, like say man could see her. I shook my head.

"If you wanna fuck him then go ahead, just don't bring my name into this," I warned.

She giggled. "Drake said hi," she announced.

"Oh, is he with Charles?"

"Yup, wanna speak to him?"

"Tell him to call me." She nodded and went back to her dumb phone conversation.

I lay back on her bed and stared up at the ceiling. All I could think about was Kayden and how he was officially mine, and vice versa. Didn't feel any different to be honest. I mean, maybe it was only right to take this relationship to the next level, we were already acting more than friends should, so I guess I was used to all the kissing and shit. I shouldn't be, but I am. I felt my phone vibrate and answered straight away.

"Shubdi, wagwaan!" 

He laughed at my enthusiasm. "You still call me that?" 

My face dropped. "Yeah why not? Is that not your name?"

"Nah, its Drake b." He chuckled again. He was talking differently, more sophisticated.

"Wait, what's happened to you? You seem different..."

"Nothing b, just more focused in life init." 

I paused. Say what?

"Hm, okay. I don't like you all refined."

"No more Shubdi and Punjib."

I gasped dramatically. "That's bullshit! Who did this to you? You used to be so cool!" 

He laughed. "Met this girl a couple weeks ago." 

My eyebrows furrowed. I knew it. "So this bitch has changed you?"

"She ain't changed me b, I'm still the same Drake."

"No, fuck Drake. I want Shubdi back!"

"Maybe another time, yeah? Right now I have to get some prospectuses for Brighton University." 

My eyes widened. "She's got you doing applications now aswell? Friggin’ hell, who is this chick?!"

"Aaliyah. She's perfect man, allow her." 

Huh. Sounded familiar.

"Whatever dude, this won't cut it." 

I heard him smile. "We can still buss joke, don't worry."

"Mm, I'm gonna go now."

"Aight, later yeah?"

"Uh-huh." I locked off and felt confused. The bitch has changed my Shubdi, how fucking dare she! I sighed and closed my eyes. I could picture Kayden's face in my mind, smiling.

"Who's Shubdi? Sounds Indian," I heard Brooks say.

"Drake, man! We used to have some bad ass nicknames for each other, now he refuses to be called Shubdi." I kissed my teeth and played with her teddy; felt liked plucking its beady eyes out and ripping it's head off.

"Ahh, shame." She laughed and got up. I watched her as she went to her drawer. She opened the second one then searched around the back before retrieving a packet and closing it again. Once she turned around I noticed it was the morning after pill. I sat up.

"I thought you used protection?" I asked.

She sighed. "We usually do, but last night was different, he said he wanted it to be special."

"You need to be careful."

"We are careful; this was a one-off, leave Charles alone."

"I'll leave him alone when you leave his dick alone."

"I'll leave his dick alone when you get some of Kayden's." She smiled knowingly.

Okay, she won that round.

"We only just started going out, who said I'm gonna bang him now?"

She opened her bottle of Evian and backed it with the pill, then looked at me. "It's Kayden; he seems like a sex fiend. You honestly think you two won't have sex?" She laughed and I narrowed my eyes.

"I don't wanna talk about this," I admitted quietly.

"Cos you know it's true!"

I threw her teddy at her but she caught it. I was sick of her being right sometimes. Obviously I was able to control myself, and I'm sure he could too. We can hold out for a few days—months! I meant months.

"What if he's been fucking other chicks on the side?" she whispered.

I slowly turned to her. "What makes you think that?"

She shrugged. "Think about it. You two only just got together, but imagine before this, he could’ve been beating and getting it in daily."

I rolled my eyes, dismissing the idea. "Whatever."

"Just saying. You never know. Just be aware of the type of person he is."

I raised an eyebrow and sat against the headboard. "The hell are you on about? What are you tryna say?"

"I hear things about him, how he's dangerous, I just want you to careful."

Dangerous?

"Who told you that?" I questioned.

"Different people."

"Like?"

"Gavin and them ones. He's known everywhere."

I shrugged. "I know Kayden; we've been close for ages now."

"Doesn't mean something couldn't go wrong," I tutted in annoyance. "Seriously Becc's, just be careful."

"I'm always careful!"

"Yeah..." The front door sounded, Brooks turned to me, now ceasing conversation. "Probably my mum." I nodded and went on her computer...

I had dropped off the Christmas presents back at mine, and was now headed to his. Yesterday he had told me to come round since he'd "be about", so that's exactly what I was doing. I passed a group of pricks who were sat on roadside as usual. They all fell silent and watched me like thirsty vampires. Bloody wallads. Fortunately they didn't say anything, and for the first time I managed to air a group of boys who wanted to 'get to know me'.

I eventually got to his door and rang the doorbell. I waited patiently till the door opened. His mum was stood there, surprisingly with a smile on her face, it was quite unexpected. She stepped aside and let me through. I closed the door behind me and pulled my jacket off.

"How've you been, Rebecca?" she asked with a genuine smile.

"Alright, thanks. What about you?"

"Not too bad. Marcus is taking me out for a while."

I smiled. "That's nice; I hope you enjoy yourselves,"

"We will." She took my jacket for me and placed it on the edge of the banister. Her face was literally glowing. Maybe there was more to her happiness, but I'll just leave her to it. I truly hoped that she stayed in this mood. I cleared my throat.

"Is Kayden in?"

Her smile faded slightly as she anxiously looked up the staircase. "Probably up there doing something suspicious. I heard banging earlier, go and investigate."

I nodded and laughed lightly before heading upstairs. I opened his door to see him stood by the window smoking. He noticed my presence and turned to look at me. His face softened.

"Ree..."

I smiled and closed the door. "You alright?"

"Yeah."

He put out the spliff and flicked it out the window. I slowly approached him and his smile widened as he pulled me closer and kissed me on the forehead. Just to be in his arms again felt indescribable. I peered into his tired, brown eyes which were glossy in excitement and raised a brow.

"You sure?" I asked again.

He noticed my expression and chuckled lightly. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Good point. I was just curious. You look buzzed."

"That's cos I am." His soft lips crushed mine instantly. I responded and held his neck.

We stood there and kissed for a few minutes, and it felt good. All I could think about was the fact that he was now mine, I could do whatever I wanted and it wouldn't be a problem, whereas before it would was seen as wrong. The taste of weed lingered on his tongue as it slid into my mouth. I slowly pulled away and he rubbed my arm.

"Weed," I coughed.

He smirked; the dimple that had been hidden for months was shown once again. "Taste's nice init?"

"It's disgusting."

He held my waist and smiled. "Don't worry about it. How was work?"

"I'm off, remember? It's my holiday."

He nodded slowly, still looking dazed. "Seen."

I rolled my eyes. "You really need to cut down on the smoking. You're being dopey."

"I'm fine," he insisted, running his hands down my back.

"Course you are, addict. Anyway, me and Brooklyn went Christmas shopping." I grinned.

"Did you get me anything?"

"That depends...have you got me anything?"

He moved away from me to sit on the bed. "Gonna have to wait and see."

He patted the empty space beside him so I sat. He was being odd today, like not himself. Apart from the weed, his behaviour was off-key. I dunno what it was, but it was bait, and quite unsettling.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked.

His eyes drooped and his smirk returned. "Nothin'. Why d’you keep asking me that?"

"Cos you're fucked. Did you think I wouldn't notice?"

He rubbed his red eyes. "Not at all, Becc's."

"See what I mean? You never call me that!"

"Shh." He gently pushed me back and climbed ontop of me. He kissed my neck softly and stared into my eyes. "I'm just happy," he explained. "You know everything's gonna be alright from here on, init?"

I blinked in confusion. "How do you know that?" I challenged.

He smiled in return. "I just do, you don't have to worry about anything ever again, I'm gonna protect you."

That made me smile instantly. "Kayden, stop being all caring and sweet, you prick."

He laughed and stroked my cheek, gazing into my eyes. "I mean it, Ree. Any problems you have, I'll be there to sort it out, so you don't need to worry."

I understood exactly what he meant. He was making his pledge to protect me, which frankly wasn't needed—I already knew that he'd protect me.

Maybe it was the weed talking.

He kissed my cheek and nose, and then licked my neck. I giggled.

"That tickles."

He chuckled. "You have a cute laugh."

"No I don't."

"You do." Then he began to tickle me like he always did. I started laughing and tried to push him away. My attempts were always futile though.

"Stop!" I yelped breathlessly. Worse thing was he knew all my ticklish areas. He simply continued.

"Say you love me and I'll stop," he demanded.

I carried on laughing and was beginning to lose air. "Kayden!" I screeched in laughter.

"Say it," he repeated with a chuckle.

"Noooo!" I tried rolling over, I tried everything, but this prick was still tickling me. Eventually I had to scream it out before he stopped, and then I caught my breath back.

"So stubborn," he commented.

"Fuck you."

"I know you wanna fuck me." I screwed him playfully. He was right.

"You're getting too brave. Never disrespect the female boss."

He tutted and rolled over, so I was sat on top, straddling him. "I think female don is better."

"I don't give a damn what you think."

He cocked a brow. His confused expression really got to me. Like, it was such a turn on, and he didn't even try. I smiled and flicked his nose, similar to what he always did to me. It made his expression deepen. I laughed at his bewilderment.

"Why Ree?"

"You do it to me, thought I'd see what all the hype is about."

"Cos your nose is flickable." I rolled my eyes and remembered something.

"Nathan said you should holla him."

He nodded languidly. "Yeah, I will."

"And Natasha was looking for you at work today," I informed, leaning on his firm chest and fiddling with his long plaits. I felt him shrug and take a deep, relaxed breath.

"She's on my nuts."

I stiffened. "Why?"

He shrugged a second time. "She just is. Think she likes me."

What? 

I brought my head up to peer at him suspiciously. "She's like 58 years old, what interest would she have in you?"

He laughed. "Dunno, but she's always hinting."

My brows furrowed. The image of her and Kayden made my blood boil. It didn't help that she was pretty either. She was like a cougar, eurgh.

"She better find someone her own age, like my dad."

He laughed and rubbed my back softly. "Is someone jealous?" I rolled my eyes and he chuckled, followed by a kiss to my cheek. "I have you now, I don't need anyone else."

I smiled and felt my heart rate speed up. With Kayden he always said stuff like this, but now it actually meant something. We were together now, and anything he says, I'll take it seriously. He stared into space for awhile and seemed distant. I raised an eyebrow at his questionable behaviour.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Nothin', I'm over the moon," he said quietly with a smirk.

I laughed at his lazy smile. "You're fucked up."

"Mmm, you have no idea, Ree," he whispered. He sat up and kissed my neck softly as he ran his hands down to my behind. I breathed deeply and held onto him as his lips latched onto my skin. The smell of weed clouded my nose, but for once I didn't mind.

He squeezed me gently and sucked on my neck. My heart jolted within my chest and my thighs clenched. Saying that I was hot and flustered would be an understatement, my skin was literally burning. I breathed deeply at the familiar sensation and felt my eyelids become heavy. I rested my hands on his shoulders as he tugged onto my hair. Before anything drastic happened I wanted to make one thing clear.

"Wait..." I struggled to mutter. He simply continued, trailing his tongue along my collar-bone. "Kayden," I warned. He stopped and looked at me quizzically. "We can't do anything yet...for awhile."

He blinked in confusion. "What?"

"I don't wanna rush into anything right now."

He processed this information and chuckled. "So now you change your mind?" he whispered, pulling me further down onto his hardening piece. I sighed and briefly closed my eyes. Why must he do this to me on purpose?

"Yeah, I don't want that...not now anyway."

He nodded slowly. "If I didn't know any better I'd say you were lying. You want Johnny."

I shook my head, and then paused. "Wait. Johnny?"

"That's his name."

I shivered. "Why would you name it?"

He laughed at my disgust. "It's the rule. Don't girls name their breasts?" I gave him a blank, displeased look. "What? If I was a female I'd name mine."

"Cos you're a prick. Normal girls don't do that."

"They should," he muttered, suggestively gaping at my chest.

I screwed. "The hell are you doing?"

"I'll name this one Tina," he claimed, pointing to my left breast. As stupid as it was I laughed and shook my head.

"You're ridiculous."

"And this one can be Shullamite," he said, nudging my right one.

All laughing ceased. "Are you taking the piss?"

He smiled and the dimple was shown. "What's the problem?"

"That name’s fucked!"

He laughed. "Allow the name. That was some girl from my work experience, she was sexy you know."

I shook my head with narrowed eyes. "You know what; I'm not even getting into this."

He smiled and kissed my neck. "Alright, not Shullamite. I'll think of a new one," he promised.

"They don't require names you pleb. Leave my breasts alone."

"But I like them. They deserve their own persona," he muttered against my neck, now fondling with them both. I sighed and shivered under his touch. "How about Thing One and Thing Two?"

I laughed. "You're going to hell."

"I'll be playing with Thing One later," he whispered, pinching my left nipple through my bra. I slapped his hand away.

"Stop, that hurt," I frowned.

He carried a mocking smile on his face. "Sorry."

"No you're not sorry, you cunt."  I screwed him and he raised a brow.

"You gettin' rude?"

"Yeah, I am. And what?"

He brought his face closer to mine in an intimidating manner. "I'd have to deal with you," he uttered in a sinister tone.

"You can't do shit."

"Are you sure about that?" I found his smirk amusing.

"Positive."

He suddenly flipped over so he was on top and roughly pinned me down by my hands as he lay between my legs. Before I could even attempt to escape he rested his body on mine and gave a knowing smile. I didn't know what was worse; this, or the handcuffs.

"Why are you so heavy?" I sputtered, trying to shove him off.

"I'm a man."

"That doesn't answer my question, dipshit."

He smiled cheekily. "And you continue to get rude?" I laughed. "I can do anything to you in this position, I say you be careful. You're treading on thin ice."

I scoffed. "Whatever, dude."

He gripped onto my wrists tighter, only using one hand for the both of mine. Then he grinned. "Remember the whipped cream?" he murmured.

I pouted my lips as the vivid memory came back. "I don't wanna remember. You took advantage of me."

He laughed hysterically. "How was I taking advantage when you enjoyed it?" I stayed silent and looked away. "Uhhh Kaydennn," he teased, mimicking me. I screwed and kicked my legs.

"Shut the fuck up. I don't sound like that."

He continued to laugh. "You do truss." I kissed my teeth. "But I like it, especially your face."

I frowned. "What about my face?"

"When you bite your lip and that. Reminds me of them Ebony girls in porn."

I cringed and thrashed about some more. "That's disgusting!" I cried.

He laughed. "It's true. I feel like I'm fingering a porn-star."

My brows furrowed. "Shut the fuck up Kayden!"

"Alright alright, calm down." I sighed and shook my head. "I prefer you in this position, makes it easier to undress you." He gave his infamous sideways smirk and glanced down at my jeans. Already I knew what he had in mind, and he had the advantage. Once he gets me going I couldn't stop. I didn't want to take any chances.

"No, don't!"

He smiled gently. "I'm joking, Ree. We'll wait like you said. No rush." He released my wrists and stroked my arm instead. His warm touch caused me to weaken instantly.

"How do I know when the time is right?" I questioned.

"Y’know that urge you’ve been getting? They’ll intensify, and your heart will ache. It’s hard to explain. You’ll just know." I smiled at his words, and then his face softened. He took a deep, steady breath. "Would I be your first though?"

I quirked a brow. "What do you mean?"

He traced his fingertips over my jawbone like he always did; it was soothing in a way. "You sure there isn’t somethin' you ain't telling me?" he asked quietly.

"Like what?"

"Like what that fucker did to you." I quickly caught on to what he was referring to and shook my head. 

"I don't wanna get into this." I was sick of him bringing up the same subject, especially now. Right when things were going good, he tends to ruin it. What's done is done, that was the past. I hate dwelling on old news. When will he realise that?

"You can tell me. I wanna know."

I grunted in frustration. "I don't wanna talk about it."

He stared right at me. "I do. Did he rape you?"

I froze and became still. I didn't know what to say. His eyes bored into mine as he searched for an answer—an answer that I wasn't willing to give. His eyebrows dropped slightly. 

"He did init?" His voice was raised.

"No, he didn't," I answered finally.

"Ree..." he began.

"He didn't," I repeated.

He was silent for a few seconds. I turned away from his intrusive glare and swallowed hard. He stared at me a few moments more, contemplating whether to take my word for it or not. Then he finally looked away and stared at the wall instead. 

"You don't believe me, do you?" I asked.

He remained silent.

I kissed my teeth and lightly pushed him off me; if he wants to act like a bitch-boy then fine. He should be able to believe me. Foolish cunt.

I sat at the edge of the bed and peered down at my legs in deep thought. Look at you, Becca; sat there taking everything out on him when really he's done nothing but worry about your welfare. None of this was his fault. Guess I can't blame him for being so protective over me.

I felt his weight move on the bed as he shifted closer behind me. His strong arms enclosed around me and held me tight, and then he kissed my cheek.

"I believe you," he whispered in my ear. I nodded slowly and turned to him. He did his infamous smirk, which made me smile in return.

"You're so gay."

"Allow me Ree." I laughed quietly and he pecked me on the lips. "What you wanna do?"

"Sleep. I'm tired." He brushed my hair back with his fingers and we lay down. I laid my head on his chest as he gently stroked my arm. "We're gonna forget this whole situation," I said finally, breaking the silence. He grunted softly, I could tell how much he strongly disagreed. He released a heavy sigh and looked at me.

"I won't mention it again. Just know that you're safe with me now. I won't let anything happen to you." I nodded slowly; he pecked me softly on the lips and then smiled. "Sleep," he whispered. I took his advice for once and closed my eyes then eventually drifted off to sleep...

The sound of loud music woke me. I opened my eyes and turned to the space beside me. Kayden was no longer there. I sat up and scratched my head. Shit, I had a headache. I slowly got out of bed and trudged out of his room. I went downstairs and immediately smelt food.

Mmm, food...

I went into the kitchen to see Kayden by the microwave, blasting Reggae from the radio and dishing food from the pot. 

What? Since when did this pleb cook?!

He turned and noticed me stood there. A smile formed on his face.

"Finally awake?"

"Well you can see me stood here," I answered with a straight face.

He laughed. "Watch init, badgyal. Gettin' too big for your boots." I smiled and approached him. He dished the curry goat and rice onto three separate plates.

"Smells nice. But that can't be right cos you can't cook."

He gave me a playful screw. "I cook all the time." I gave him a look. "Fine I don't, but I used to."

"So I won't get ill from food-poisoning nah?" He kissed his teeth and I laughed and poked him in the ribs. He called Zaine to get his food then we all went into the living-room. We ate and watched the music channel. Had to admit, this food was delicious.

"When are your parents coming back?" I asked.

He shrugged in response. "In about an hour."

"No, they went to Erica's house with Uncle Trey and Shavonne so they won't be back yet," Zaine corrected, eating a spoonful of rice. I cooed at him as he ate, he was so awesome without even trying.

"You might have to do my hair soon, Ree," Kayden informed with a nudge.

I rolled my eyes. "Why can't that Cassandra woman do it?"

"She's always occupied, you do it better anyway."

I smiled triumphantly. That's what I like to hear.

"Okay, just tell me when and I'll do it."

He smiled and fed me some of his food. In the end I was stuffed. Maybe he was trying to fatten me up or something, but I was full. Zaine went upstairs to play Xbox and we remained downstairs watching TV. I rested on him as he rubbed my stomach. I sighed contently.

"I gotta work in a few weeks." I whined just thinking about it.

"I'm off for abit, I need a break."

"We both need a break. I can't take that shit-hole much longer."

"Yeah I hear you." He kissed my forehead and I smiled at him. He smiled back in the same way. "What?" he asked.

"I can't believe we're together."

He chuckled lightly. "I've been waiting forever."

I raised a brow in question. "How long's forever?"

He shrugged. "Just know it's been a long time, but now I've finally got you." He flicked my nose and I laughed.

"Nah don't do that, I won't be able to beat you up for it. I'm too full."

He cooed. "Aww baby, did I give you too much?"

"Yes you fucking did."

"Why did you eat it then?"

I scowled. "Cos it was nice, why do you think?"

"Eye's too big for yuh belly," he whispered in my ear. He gently bit my ear lobe and I pushed his head away.

"Don't do that you prick."

He chuckled lightly. "I can do whatever I want."

"Not in this relationship you can't." He flicked my nose once again. "Kayden, don't piss me off." He was about to do it again when I growled. "Don't think I won't drop-kick you," I threatened. I kissed my teeth and he laughed.

"You're so cute."

"Fuck off." He continued to get on my nerves. In a way I didn't mind, I just felt like being violent towards him, so I pulled his hair. He screwed me and I laughed. "That's what you get biatch," I muttered groggily as my eyes began to close. I wasn't sure if it was the amount of food I ate or the fact that this prick was wearing me out, but I was seriously tired.

Perhaps it's just the food. Niggeritis was taking over...

Kayden

Her eyes were now closed. She looked exhausted and drained. I thought of carrying her back up to bed and doing things to her before she fell asleep, but I knew better than to mess with her when she was tired. I admired her beautiful features as she began to drift off.

"Can't believe you're all mine," I whispered. I stroked her face and fiddled with her strands of hair. She was so precious to me; I couldn't help but stare at her. I try my hardest not to be possessive, but it never worked. With Ree I felt something special, and I know she felt it too, so it's only right that we were together now. I was serious about protecting her, now with that Leon prick taken care of, she won't have to worry.

It was hard to think positively about her ordeal when I knew what Leon was capable of. However, Ree insisted that I let it go. But how did she expect me to? What if he did have his way with her? She'd be emotionally scarred for life. I just wanted her to be happy, so I wasn't gonna bring it up again, I couldn't. I didn't want her to stress right now, not so near to Christmas. Maybe if I just find out for myself. After all, I have my sources. I felt a vibration in my pocket; I retrieved my phone to see a text from Christian;

—Fedz are onto us

Cum round mine ASAP

Ree's eyes slowly opened, she looked right at me and smiled.

"I wanna lie down," she whispered. I breathed deeply and looked at the clock; it was coming up to 9PM. I shook my head and she noticed my expression. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." I watched the clock once more before peering back into her confused eyes. "I need to drop you home, it's getting late."

Her eyes widened in disbelief. "That's never stopped you before. It ain't even that late."

"I don't want your dad and uncle to worry." She rolled her eyes. I helped her up and she got her things ready. Once we were at the front door I saw Zaine coming down the stairs.

"Where you going?" he asked.

"Taking Ree home. I'll be back in a bit."

He nodded and waved. "Bye Becc's. Tell Diamond I said hi."

"Yeah, I will. See you later ragamuffin." She ruffled his hair and we soon left.

As we got into the car all I could think about was the time. Feds knew about Leon already...and they knew I was involved, which means they'll be coming for me...searching for me...

Shit shit shit.

Ree glanced out the window whilst tapping her feet to the songs from my rap CD. I didn’t have time to listen to music, I could only think of how the fuck I was gonna get out of this one. Been in trouble to many times, and I always got away...but this time that may not be possible. 

Fuck.

I soon got to hers, which didn't take that long since there was barely any traffic. She turned to me.

"Thanks for the ride," she said.

I watched her closely and thought of what she would go through if the police were to ever find me. I couldn't do that to her, she meant too much to me.

So I have to get outta here.

I pulled her close and laid my lips on hers. She was stunned for a few seconds but eventually complied. Our tongues locked and I could feel her heart thumping loudly. This could be the very last time we even shared a kiss. Soon I pulled away, leaving her panting in shock.

"Wow," she said.

I smiled and rubbed her thigh. "I'll call you," I lied. She nodded and stepped out the car, then closed it shut and watched me. "Bye Ree." She waved and I drove off down the road. All the while I swerved and managed to dodge traffic in an attempt to reach Chris in time. I needed to know exactly what was going on. I had to get away from the feds, and quick.

Becca

I stepped into the house feeling mildly confused and light-headed. Dunno what that was about, but that kiss sent me to another dimension... Alright that's corny, but it was amazing to say the least. I closed the door and leaned against it. I could've sworn he rushed me out the house, if so this would have been the first time ever. I went into the living-room to see Uncle Clayton playing Nintendo Wii with Diamond as Claycia sat there texting. They all paused and turned to me like I was an intruder.

"Where yuh been, yout?" he asked with a stern glare.

QUICK. What's the first name that comes to mind...?

"I was at Brooklyn's house."

Uncle gave a confused look. "Brooklyn...why her name suh?"

I laughed, but he was serious. "It's an American name, uncle." He nodded. "Where's dad?"

"Went shop fi get sum food." 

"Oh, right."

"Rebecca, I beat your high score," Diamond beamed excitedly, referring to my Wii Sports Resort game.

"Well done." I ruffled her hair and she laughed then we shared a high-five. "By the way, Zaine said hello," I informed with a private smirk. She blushed. I had almost forgotten uncle was in the room.

"Zaine who?" he bellowed with a snarl.

"Nevermind!" I smiled sweetly and headed upstairs to start some Diploma coursework. It was long though, having to interview different people and shit, and then marking it down on some paper. Truth be told I don't know what the hell I was doing; I tend not to listen to the teacher. My phone vibrated and I looked to see I had a text from Grace.

— I think chris went missing agen -_-

I shook my head and replied.

— Leave him to it, he's bein stupid

I'll call u later, gotta finish this c/w

— Okie dokie x

I set my phone to charge and turned back to the one thing I hated most...my coursework. I decided to get to work. Ms Johnson should feel lucky that I actually cared about my A Levels. As I worked, I couldn't help but think about Kayden. His weird behaviour didn't go unnoticed, and I wanted to know what was on his mind when we left the house. 

Half an hour later I was done. I stuffed my work in my Drama Folder before placing it in my bottom drawer. There was a knock at my door.

"Come in," I called. The door swiftly opened and Claycia stepped in.

"Are you busy?"

"You sleep in here, don't be stupid." I gestured for her to shut the door and she did. Then she hopped onto my bed and peered down at her legs as they swung to and fro. I watched her with a raised brow. "You alright?"

"Yeah...just wanted to ask you something."

I nodded slowly. "What?"

"What do you do if you like someone, but they're already with someone else?"

I exhaled heavily. Well, that's a tough one.

"Err..." I scratched my head. "Never been in that predicament before. Who's this prick?"

"He's not a prick; he's a really nice boy who goes to my school."

"Does he have a name?"

"Brandon."

I nodded and sat beside her. "Have you told him?"

"No. I don't even talk to him, he doesn't realise I exist."

"Why don't you try talking to him then?"

She shrugged. "I don't see the point." She fiddled with her fingers and refused to give me eye-contact once. Bless her cotton socks; she was always so shy—too shy for a Jamaican girl. I wonder why she was so reserved...

"I'm not saying you should tell him...but you should tell him."

She giggled lightly. "What if he gets rude to me?"

"Then I'd have to fuck him up and throw him in a bin."

She started laughing. "As if you'd ever do that, Rebecca."

I smiled. She had no idea. "Course I wouldn't. Anyway, best thing to do is tell him, so you could actually get over him. Once you've done it, you release the tension built up in your chest and the weight is lifted off your shoulders."

She looked unsure. "But things would be awkward between us."

"Not if you say it correctly. Just walk up to him, and be like 'yeah I like you init, so what you sayin'?'"

She laughed and shook her head. "What about the girl he's with?"

"I'm not expecting you be with him, Clay. Just let him know and see what he says."

She nodded slowly. "Okay, I'll tell him when I go back to school."

"Yeah man." I smiled, then the doorbell was heard.

"WE GOT PIZZA!" I heard Andre call from downstairs. I licked my lips... I'll be sure to take his share...

The sun shone on our skins as we lay there in a comfortable silence. I didn't want to speak and ruin this moment; I was too comfortable to even open my mouth. I could hear children laugh in the distance while dogs happily barked in the background. I sighed happily as Kayden rubbed more sun cream on my stomach and legs. 

The weather was beautiful. I enjoyed the feel of his hands caressing my tanned skin, rubbing in circular motions, shifting lower each time. I opened my eyes to witness him smiling down at me. His naked torso shone in the light, the cream I had applied on him made his chest and stomach glisten. He looked...edible. He smirked sideways as he rubbed more cream on my thigh.

"What you smiling at?" he questioned.

I shook my head. "Nothing, Gretel, don't worry about it."

He raised a brow. "Gretel?"

"Yeah that's your name now."

"I prefer Kayden," he stated. He continued his circular motion, rubbing all areas of my body with soft hands. Funny thing is I didn't even ask for him to do this. He just used any excuse to touch me—the perv. "Next time we should go to the beach," he whispered in my ear.

"Mmhm, but this is still nice."

"Yeah, it is." He kissed my lips lightly and stroked my lower stomach. "I wanna do so many things to you right now," he muttered, getting closer to my inner thigh.

"We're in a public park," I pointed out.

"I've always been an exhibitionist, Ree. I don't mind doing it behind the slide." I slapped his arm and he laughed.

"That's disgusting; I'm not about that life."

"It's hard not to take you right here when you're lying in front of me in your underwear." I rolled my eyes.

"Bikini, not underwear," I corrected.

"Same ting." He moved to my chest and rubbed softly. I gave him a look and he smiled knowingly.

"Don't do it, Kayden," I warned.

"Fine, I'll just wait till we get home." He smirked and squeezed my breast. I yelped and pushed his hand away.

"Stop!"

He laughed. "Calm down."

Suddenly I heard his name being called. He looked ahead into the distance and I looked aswell...but there was no-one there.

"Who was that?" I asked.

Kayden ignored me and continued to stare ahead. I followed his glance, but all I could see was children beating up each other in the sandpit. His name was called once again, more urgently this time. I sat up and tried my best to see the source of the call.

"You're hearing that, right?" I asked him. But when I turned back Kayden had vanished. I spun around in confusion, and then saw him walking off into that same direction. I quickly stood up, heart now racing. "Kayden? Kayden!"

He proceeded to walk forward into the distance. I watched him as he paced further away from me. I decided to run after him to see what was going on. The voice continued to call him and suddenly we weren't even in the park anymore, we were now surrounded by complete and utter darkness. All I could see was him now, walking away slowly with no regards to the new atmosphere. No matter how slowly he walked, I couldn't catch up to him...and every time I did, he would fade away even more.

"For real, this isn't funny anymore!" I yelled, beginning to panic. Why was he walking away from me?

"I'm leaving," he said quietly, still advancing.

"What? Leaving to go where?!"

"I'm leaving," he repeated. "I'm not coming back."

The sudden words shocked me. What did he mean? I didn't know whether to take this seriously or not. By this time the unknown voice began to shout his name, getting even more impatient. Kayden began to run, so I ran along with him. I didn't understand why this was happening. None of this made any sense.

"Where are you going?" I asked in desperation. No matter what I did, I could no longer see his face. He ignored me. It was as if wherever he was running to didn't have an end. I felt the tears as they escaped my eyes and rushed down my cheeks in frenzy. He was leaving me and I didn't even know why.

"Let me come with you," I croaked, trying my best to keep up with his speed.

"It's too dangerous," another voice answered in his place. Suddenly I recognised the familiar voice, which I should have known all along. I stopped running altogether.

"Christian?" I asked. After that it was silent. I watched as Kayden ran off into the darkness without turning back once, then soon disappeared and was swallowed into the darkness...

I sat up breathing heavily. My chest rose and fell from the shock and I felt physically drained. I glanced around at my surroundings. I was in my room again...in bed.

"Shit...just a dream," I muttered to myself, resting my hands on my chest to feel my hearts palpitations.

"R...Rebecca?" Claycia yawned from the bed opposite mine. I nodded in the darkness as if she could see me. "Why are you awake?"

"I don't know," I muttered slowly. That was the weirdest dream I've had of Kayden so far. I didn't know why I'd ever dream such a thing... I had a bad feeling about this.

*

Christmas came and went. Nothing special. Got all kinds of shit, but it was nothing. The Drake concert was cool too, he has a lot of energy, I enjoyed myself. We were now in the cold month of February and I wasn't happy at all.

In fact, I was pissed off.

I hadn't seen him since that day before Christmas. Bitch couldn't even call me. All he did was text me one time telling me he loved me. Don't get me wrong, it was sweet at the time, but his presence would make me even happier. I don't understand how he expected this relationship to work if we didn't even see each other.

I didn't know I'd be this angry at him before, but now I see that it's possible. He had no idea how I was feeling right now. I couldn't even begin to list the amount of times I thought about him these past two months. Even as January passed he wasn't around. You'd think he's run away or some shit, but what for? He needs to come and see me, that's what he needs to do. I never even see him around anymore. Not at work, not as his, not on street...and definitely not at mine.

I've continued having those crazy dreams as well. I preferred the sex dreams to be honest. I just didn't understand why he supposedly went through all this trouble to be with me if he's gonna ignore me just like that in two months straight. I'd know if I did something to upset him, but I haven't. Right now I was beginning to doubt him; both as a friend and a boyfriend. If he was in front of me right now I'd kick him in the balls; that's the only thing I could do to express my rage right now.

I strolled out of college with Gavin, who was on the phone to one of his bitches as per usual. Yeah, he was a player, every minute he was on the phone to some hoe, reminded me of Kieran. But that's his business; I didn't even care right now.

"Yeah, I'll see you soon init. Gimme an hour."

"....."

"I'm with my friend."

"....."

"Yeah, she's a girl." I rolled my eyes.

"....."

His eyebrows furrowed. "What you tryna say?"

"....."

"I said she's my friend, are you stupid? Don't piss me off."

I zoned out after that.

We crossed the road and eventually got to McDonalds. When we entered the queue he locked off the phone and smiled at me, but I didn't return the smile. I screwed thin air and felt like punching someone.

"What's wrong, Becc's?"

"MEN. That's what fucking wrong. All you fucked up creatures with no heart or soul. You all make me sick!" A couple of white children turned around and stared at me in horror. Gavin was silent for a minute.

"I didn't even do anything."

"You have a penis, therefore you are male. You fit the category."

"Shit, if I buy you a meal will that cheer you up?"

"No."

He sighed and hugged me from behind. "I already got Isaac for you."

"He's not the problem."

"Mm, want me to find this other prick and beat him up for you?" I smiled slightly at the kind gesture. But no, nothing will make me better right now.

"Forget it Gavin. Just fuck everything right now."

"I feel you. I'm still gonna buy you something anyway, alright?"

"No, not alright."

He laughed lightly and bought two Big Macs. We sat down and he bit into his burger and glanced at me. I sat there with my arms folded across my chest, staring down at my lap. I just wanted to go home; I didn't feel like having company at all. I was fine up until this point, until today in 6th form Isaac mentioned his name...I specifically told him not to. As a consequence Gavin dealt with him for me and decided to take me to McDonalds. Worst part is that I got work in a few minutes.

Argh fuck meee man!

We spoke about life and how shit it was. He kept questioning me and asking me what was wrong, but I couldn't tell him. Plus that would mean mentioning his name, and I didn't want to do that. Eventually we finished and I thanked him for the meal. He hugged me and we went our separate ways.

I sighed as I walked into Footlocker. There were a group of boys walking around and looking at things. I just shrugged and went through the back doors to get ready to work in this shit-hole. Sat at the table in the staff room was Natasha; she was flicking through a magazine and drinking her treasured bottle of Lucozade. She noticed I was stood there and smiled. I simply grunted in return.

"Hey, Becc's."

"You alright bitch?" I asked walking to my locker.

She paused. "W-What?"

"I said your voice is high pitch, do you have a cold?"

She blinked a few times. "Erm...yeah, I kinda do."

"Might wanna sort that out." I opened my locker and quickly changed into my FL top. Afterwards I shut it and turned to her. Wait for it Becc's...she's bound to do it...any moment now...

"Where's Kayden?" she asked.

Bingo.

"I dunno, why don't you call him?" I raised a brow.

"I don't have his number," she grumbled.

"Aww, how unfortunate." I smiled sweetly and left the room. I got behind the counter and felt bored instantly. Sir wasn't even in today. I could actually walk out right now if I wanted to. He's lucky I'm a good individual.

A couple hours went past and I was conversing with Nathan. I managed to bribe him to swap roles for the day so that I could stack instead. Standing there in the same spot for a few hours was not the way forward. I'd rather hang shit up. For now I was on my break, even though I haven't done anything yet. I stood in front of the counter instead of behind it for a change and leaned against it as I spoke to Nathan, who was playing with a pound coin like a jack-ass.

"Do you miss Stacey?" I asked.

He nodded. "Yeah, a lot. Just waiting for her to come back."

"When will that be?"

"I don't know. She mentioned staying there permanently." 

The bitch! How dare she have fun in Manchester while I was stuck in this shitty city suffering with nothing better to do than to torment Andre's life and work in this shit-hole.

"I'll be having words with her."

He chuckled lightly then stared at me for a few seconds. I noticed his expression reminded me oddly of him... I shook the thought out of my head and sighed.

"What's wrong?" he asked. 

"Nothing."

He leaned closer and peered into my eyes. "It's Kayden, init?" I shook my head. "It is. I know it is," he insisted. I rolled my eyes. "I know where he is."

Suddenly my ears perked up at the revelation. "Where?"

"In hiding."

I raised a brow. What the hell? What kinda 007 shit is this? Why was he hiding?

"Hiding from what?" I questioned.

He sighed and scratched my head. This meant that he's spoken to him recently, otherwise how else would he know?

"I'm not even supposed to tell you," he muttered.

"Hiding from what, Nathan?" I urged.

He clenched his jaw then turned away. "I can't say." 

"Argh, fuck off then." I kissed my teeth and walked off to the hats section instead. Fuck Nathan, fuck Kayden, and fuck everyone else. I don't need him; if he wants to hide then he can hide. I ain't got time for his childish games.

"Excuse me..." I turned to see a light-skinned boy around my age, slightly tall and slender with a medium build. His eyes peered into mine with interest, he smiled.

"What?" I snarled bluntly.

"You seem upset, I was wondering if you're alright."

"I'm bloody fantastic," I spat sarcastically.

"Oh, alright. Just making sure." He gave a genuine smile. I grunted. Why must he keep smiling? I seriously wasn't in the mood for this.

"I appreciate you being concerned, but I'd prefer if you actually moved away from me before I use weapons of mass destruction to impale your brain and beat the shit outta you." I gave him a blank stare.

He stiffened and slowly backed away. I sighed deeply. That was the last time a boy will try to holler at me, I'll make sure of it. I cursed under my breath and began to place the hats on the appropriate shelves. I stared out the window absentmindedly at the passer-by’s. I remember when Kieran and I were younger; we would stand by this exact window and scare the fuck out of whoever walked passed. Those were the days.

I sighed and noticed a blacked out car parked against the curb. I couldn't even see the driver as the windows were tinted. I continued to stare at the car, trying to guess if anyone was inside it or not. Just then the window slowly wound down. I watched intently wondering what the driver was planning to do. Suddenly a hand drew out from the open window, with a gun pointed right in my direction. My heart thumped.

"Oh shit," I whispered. My chest tightened and my breath hitched. I was at a loss for words; I didn't move a muscle. I remained perfectly still from the shock of having a gun pointed right at me.

The person fired.

My eyes widened.

I screamed.

Blackout.